For me 2014 will be a year that I will look back on with both joy and sadness. As I shift though the memories of this last year I am stuck again and again by how fortunate I am to have some many wonderful friends by my side. It truly is a wonderful thing to witness the happiness of other people. I’ve learned to let down my guard more, to accept the hug when it is offered. And to answer with truth when someone asks me if I am ok.
A wise woman once told me to “always be a beginner at something” I’ve taken that advice and run with it. I’ve tried new things, stepped out of my comfort zone, I have succeeded and I have failed spectacularly. Through this year I have learned that when I fall can pick myself right back up and keep going. And when I do reach that goal it was worth all of the trouble and mess.
It was also a year of finding answers to questions that I had been seeking for years. That cold day in January sitting in my Doctors finally getting answers to long sought after questions brought both pain and relief. That moment still seems as crystal clear as if it were a moment ago. Months later sitting in a hospital holding the hand of a dear friend who had suffered her own loss left me cold and sad like a walk in the park in December without a coat.
But even in those sad moments, I remember my favorite words, “ Weeping may endure the night but joy comes in the morning.” And joy comes, just like it is promised.
These are the things that I will remember about this year, this year of promise. This year of pain this year of joy.
When I look back on 2014 I will remember it as the year that I said yes. Yes to travel, to learning something new, to a different job with better opportunities. I will look back on 2014 as the year I let my guard down and made new friends, when I took risks and when started the journey of learning to love myself-my whole self.
I can only hope that 2015 is half as great as 2014 was, and that I will always be a beginner at something.